7-23-01
So I am taking a little night swim (skinny dip with Ginger) and happen upon a nasty little sea urchin. These are the things you often see that look like living pincushions. They sit on the bottom and don’t do a lot apart from try not to get eaten. They do this like a porcupine would. Just stick out the needles and hope nothing is stupid enough to try anything. Well I had no interest at all in the damn thing. I just didn’t see it. Alcohol and dark can have an effect on your perception of what is reasonable. My bad.
The pain of the stick was quite bad actually. Ginger got one too but was too drunk to really care much. I guess one stick should have been enough. I got 8. They all went into the bottom of my foot quite deep. I went inside the house and tried to get them out but only could get 2. The rest were deep inside and each attempt to dig them out either broke them off or lodged the quills further in. It was late, I was drunk and Ginger was sleeping so I did too.
Next day the foot is killing me. I can barely walk on it and when I get to work everyone on the boat says I need to pee on it. Great, I think. Where am I going to get that much pee?
So with a little coaxing I try it (no details on this one folks). By mid morning it really hurts and I don’t think the pee was doing it’s job. So I decide to go down to the local DAN hospital. It is the site of the hyperberic chamber and DAN is the divers best friend. Last year in August I purchased their preferred membership and divers insurance. Thinking I should take advantage of the insurance, I went to that hospital. They quickly take me down to the treatment room and in a few short minutes I am sitting on a table with my pained foot in a bucket of very hot water. This lasts about 45 min. When the treatment is done they put some cream on my foot and tell me I am done. Great treatment huh? The doctor gives me a prescription for more cream and as it turns out the stuff contains Urea (uric acid like in your urine). When I get to the counter the lady has no interest in my membership and charges me $40 for the visit. I explain to her that this is DAN insurance card preferred membership! She asks me to pay the bill again. I say "NO" DAN Diver friend, DAN, Card carrying preferred member! She was not impressed. Then she hands me a receipt and tells me to send it into DAN and they will pay me back. This is a DAN hospital right?
I am really pissed (not on my foot) but figure the people at the hospital don’t make the rules and I leave to get my prescription. $14 for more cream and I am back at work and my foot is still killing me.
After 8 days the foot is okay to walk on but still hurts a bit. DAN has not replied to my email about my money, and I am on the verge of a major DAN bashing campaign. Had I gone to the local hospital I am sure I would have been better off and had more money left in my pocket too.
I finally go to a calling center and call DAN's number (which is not Toll free). They explain to me the long paper process to get my money back. I jumped through the hoops with them for a couple of months and finally they send me a check for $40 to cover the cost of my visit. I had spent over $100 for the crappy insurance in the first place. Problem is there is no way to cash a US check in Mexico. No one will accept it and it is worthless. If any of you ever think about getting DAN for diving don't bother. Once they get your money you will never see it again.
I guess I should have followed my own advice. When in Rome do as the Romans. Piss on it.
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